The family has been on a major Jones for Mexican food recently. This has been fueled by Oscar the Grouch's penchant for buying anything from any store within a 20 mile radius from home that is listed on the Star Bulletin's Bidding Advantage promotion. He learned the hard way to stick to gift certificates for food as the items that dealt with in kind stuff never worked out. He'd either forget to pick up the voucher at the Star Bulletin or it would turn out to be something we really never used. One year, he bought a $200 gift certificate for Aiea Bowl thinking it could be used for food at the Alley Restaurant (we were heavily into the Lemon Crunch Cake back then). I think we used it one time and it went into storage for a year or so. Thank goodness, the Mad Cow ended up joining a league so we can now use the card. We did finally use it up at his cosmic bowling birthday party in September.
The most recent purchases were for KFC (used at one trip since the Professor ate 2 of those Famous Bowls and the Diva had a large box of wings. Throw in those funky drinks and the $50 went up in smoke) and for Caliente del Sol at the Safeway Kapahulu mini-mall. We used up most of it but still had $20 leftover. It expired today and I knew $20 would not cover the three' kids meals (let alone 5 of us) so I decided to use it on lunch for my friend and co-worker AS and myself.
I called in the order at 11:00 am and was told that the menu had just changed that morning. AS is a vegetarian and I'm trying to be one again so I asked them what they had that was veggie. The answer I got was "NOTHING" (albeit a very polite nothing). The person asked me to hold and he would see if they could do anything vegetarian. He came back and said they could make us a veggie burrito which was basically a regular burrito without meat. Since we had no other choice, I ordered two of the burritos and said I'd pick them up at 1 pm.
I got there at 1 pm and was told that my order wasn't there. In fact, nobody knew where the order form was for the order. They did remember that I called because it was "way too early". I should have known that was not a good sign. Here they had screwed up and were blaming me for not calling in my order in a timely manner.
After digging through their stack of receipts, they finally found our order but nothing had been written down. All it said was two burritos. There was some discussion on what a vegetarian burrito was before the staff came to the consensus that they would make a regular burrito but just leave the meat off. It would have been hilarious if I wasn't already kind of irked about the whole thing. Listening to them was like listening to that Rap Replinger bit about "Cheeseburga' wit' or without cheese?" "Oh, Cheeseburga' wit' one side orda cheese."
Since our order came out to $13, I was told they would not give me back the change. As the certificate expired today, I said I would just order something else. I ordered cheese nachos which we have had in the past from the place and it was HUGE. The three kids would share an order and leave about half of it. It was that much food. That putmy total at $20.91.
They did offer to give me a free soda for the hassle but I passed on that and went to Safeway to kill time. When I got back, my order was up but without the sauces. I had to wait for that to be taken care of (Ranchero for AS and Chili Verde for me).
When I got to work and opened my box, it was really disappointing and I kind of felt ripped off. There were 5 Dorito-sized tortilla chips (yes, I counted) and a green salad that looked like and was the size of the lettuce that sits on a Big Mac. It was really awful and pathetic looking, like what you'd see sitting on the plate of someone who had finished eating. The burrito was 90% rice, 5% beans (not refried but canned chili beans) and a few pieces of undercooked zucchini and eggplant. It was like eating a musubi in a tortilla - very bland and very rice-y. I had to literally pour on the sauce for it to have any flavor. The burrito was $5.99 which seemed like a deal on paper but was a total rip off. I could have gotten a $1.49 musubi from 7-11 which had the same amount of rice and much more flavor. I really felt like I had wasted $5 (make that $10 on two).
What was even more upsetting was the box of greasy chips that were passed off as cheese nachos ($6.99). My best guess is that the styrofoam box held maybe 2 cups of chips if even that. Again, the chips seemed like they had come out of a bag from Sam's Club or something, they were clearly not fresh or made there. There was maybe a tablespoon or two of melted cheese (again, totally flavorless and clearly from a bulk bag of cheapy stuff), a teeny dollop of sour cream and a pinch of something green which I am assuming was guacamole. Again, a total rip off. The kids usually scarf these down without breathing but they each ate one chip and put the box down "for the dog" (who also did not eat the chips that were left for her on the ground. Rip off of the entire amount of money.
I am glad that I used the whole gift certificate since I never want to eat there again. It was undoubtedly the most unpleasant meal I have had in ages. Even with it being theoretically half off since Oscar bought $50 of gift certificate for $25, I still feel like it was a rip off. I wouldn't have paid even $5 for that meal. Like I said, I would have gotten a musubi and some of that crank out velveeta nachos from 7-11 and been much happier and not felt as financially violated.
My guess is that in less than amonth, this place will be gone. Normally, I feel saddened when a small business in my neighborhood has to shut its doors but with this place, it will be better for everyone.
As my hairdresser said this weekend, "you know a Mexican place is bad when the food from Taco Bell is much more better."
Hey, compared to this place, Taco Bell is at Alan Wong's level.
No comments:
Post a Comment